Six Points to Discuss with Your Teen Before Their Spring Break Trip

So, your high school or college student has convinced you to let them go on a Spring Break trip away from you. Good for you! You can’t watch over them forever, and they’ve got to have opportunities to make decisions on their own in order for them to grow into healthy adulthood. But just sending them “out into the wild blue yonder” and hoping everything goes okay isn’t much of a parenting plan. You want to bless them the kind of home experience that equips them to leave home (temporarily and, eventually, permanently) prepared to face life well. So here are six important topics to discuss with them specifically and directly before their trip, with the hope of empowering and guiding them toward having a great adventure while keeping their head on straight and staying out of trouble:

1. Talk through their overall schedule/itinerary and expectations regarding communication with you. Even though you have consented to let them head out without you, it is absolutely reasonable for them to inform you of their overall plan of travel and activities and to have an agreed upon plan of communicating with you during their trip. Don’t assume they will automatically know your expectations of them, and don’t let them assume you already know everything you need to know about their plan for the week. Talk through the details, emphasizing your desire for them to have fun, as well as your expectations for them to not run off and forget who they are, so to speak.
   
2. Discuss specifically your guidelines and expectations regarding their use of alcohol, THC, or any other substances. And don’t just make simple blanket statements about this topic. Take some time to talk through the particulars of likely scenarios they will encounter, including available options and probable consequences. Lean in, be personal and realistic, and be sure to listen to their thoughts and feelings before they go. You are far more likely to provide them with guidance that makes a practical difference for them if you are specific, direct, honest, and real in discussing these kinds of issues.
   
3. Address the general dynamics and any specific guidelines regarding their social media and digital communication on a trip like this. Be sure to reinforce the importance of sober judgment, wisdom, and awareness of potential dangers related to sharing location as well as the taking and sharing of certain types of photos or videos. Again, don’t shy away from the details and realities of these things – they need your clear practical guidance. And their brains are still developing. They still need your direction and support, whether they realize it or not.
   
4. Cover issues of personal safety, awareness, handling uncomfortable situations. There’s no possible way you can anticipate every challenging or dangerous situation that might arise for them. Sorry – that’s just the reality of life. But you can certainly discuss guidelines for things that help to keep them generally safe and prepared to handle whatever happens. Keeping their phone charged and handy, being mindful of who they ride with or who rides with them, making sure someone knows where they are going when venturing out, etc. You can remind and coach them regarding important safety considerations without being a killjoy, over controlling, or absurd. Really. You can. And should.
   
5. Get real about the dynamics of personal boundaries, consent, and personal choice and accountability in relation to the people with whom they will be traveling – or even likely to encounter. Be specific about their girlfriend or boyfriend, friends, chaperone, randos, and whoever is relevant. You want them to have a great time! During the trip. And after the trip. Without a high cost of regret. Give them scenarios, ask how they would handle them, and do your best to listen with support and encouragement, as well as guidance.
   
6. Include some conversation about emergency preparedness. Be sure to gear it toward the actual trip they are taking. This doesn’t have to be heavy or scary – you could even make it fun. I know you don’t want to think about your child being in a dangerous or scary situation. But if something like that does unfold, you and they will both be extremely glad you went through those uncomfortable scenarios before they happened! And here’s hoping the reality of their Spring Break experience is one of fun, adventure, making great memories, and growing up a bit more on their transition toward adulting – thanks to this conversation (or conversations) you are preparing to share together.