HopeForYourFamily

Thanks to my buddy, Hans, for the title of this post.

Men of the Baton Rouge area (and beyond), it’s here.  The kickoff of a new season!  Men are suiting up and showing up for battle to show what they are made of, and to take their game to a higher level this year.  That’s right, gentlemen.  It’s that time of year again.  Time for…

MEN’S FRATERNITY!!!

I wish words on a blog could adequately tell you how profoundly my participation in Men’s Fraternity impacted my life over the past three years.  Men, I’m telling you, Men’s Fraternity will change your life!  For now, I will share with you the words of one our pastors, who was also my excellent small group leader the first year I joined this fellowship:

Tags: coming soon..., compasses, friends, leadership, manhood, spiritual formation

Tags: adolescence, coming soon..., parenting, teens

Here’s Shep – enjoying his new “big boy” room for the first time.  A fresh coat of blue paint (what I’m calling “Rubbermaid Blue”) picked out by him and a new comfy lounging/reading chair have transformed his space into something fit for…well, a big boy.  How he got here was a good life and faith lesson for me.

He has been asking us for a while if we would paint his room blue.  Chemaine and I readily agreed, then promptly moved on to other things.  Life gets busy.  You know how it is.  Priority for him.  Not so much for us.  Finally, he prevailed upon us a month or so ago to go to Lowe’s and pick out paint.  She and I picked out several colors of blue that we thought he would like, and we could live with, then presented them to him for his selection.  He went with “Classic Blue.”  He’s old school like that.  We bought two gallons of the good stuff, then promptly moved on to other things.  Blah blah blah.

While on vacation last week, we decided to surprise him by letting him stay with his Nana on the night of our return, and we would paint his room for him and move in the cool Big Green Chair while he was away.  Only one thing stood in our way of fulfilling his desire for him – his room was a total wreck!  Just the week before vacation, one if his buddies spent the night and told us he loves coming to our house, because Shep has so much stuff.  He was delighted, but it gave us much food for thought.  Anyhow, no room makeover was going to happen without a massive cleanup of toys and other 7 year old boy room debris.  Massive cleanup.

“Shep, before you can go to Nana’s house (he loves going to Nana’s house), you have to clean up your room.”  *Groan*  *Grumble*  (He hates cleaning up his room.  He’s a 7 year old boy.  Nuff said.)  “We’ll help you, son, but you have to work and do your share.”  “…okay…”  (with hesitation and some sighing and moaning)  And the three of us proceeded to tackle the Cleanup together.  He really did work hard, with a fairly good attitude, and he even volunteered several items to give away to other kids.

Off to Nana’s for him.  Off to the store for a few additional supplies for me.  Taping, taping, taping for my wife.  And several hours later – it was finished.

When he returned the next morning and we showed him his new Big Boy Room, he basically spazzed with delight.  Actually collapsed on his bed with speechless, 7 year old boyish, exuberant glee.  It was glorious.  And it happened because he was willing to trust and obey, in a way he would much rather avoid.  He didn’t know what the reward for his hard work would be, even though we knew and could already see this moment of delight days before it actually happened.  But he trusted and obeyed.  He endured the temporary hardship of some unpleasant work and sacrifice of other much more enjoyable activity.  And he was rewarded richly.

God wants to do so much more with your life and mine than just paint it up nice and give us new stuff.  He wants to bless us beyond anything we could ask or imagine.  And He is already delighting in the moments of our receiving those blessings, before we even get there.  Will we trust and obey Him when life seems hard, unpleasant, and senseless to us?  I, for one, really want to find out what kind of Big Boy Room He is preparing for me…

Tags: family, HOPE, spiritual formation, the journey

Alright, fellas – this one deserves an encore from last year. (I’d be the St John’s Bay dude, btw – except with a son, rather than daughters.)

Tags: manhood

So, here are my new business cards (just have to get a new office phone number).  Any thoughts?  I am so grateful for opportunities to share the parenting message God has given me, whether with clients, churches, schools, etc.  The back of my card seemed a good place to pass it on, as well.

Tags: coming soon...

Thanks to Laura Story for sharing this beautiful and challenging song that expresses something I have reflected on for several years now.

Tags: HOPE, media, spiritual formation, the journey

Here are three key ways (there are certainly plenty more) to sweat with your kids to produce big results in your relationship and in their developing character.  If you live anywhere near my neck of the woods (South Louisiana), and you spend any time at all with your kids, you will be sweating with them.  But might as well do it with purpose.  PARENT LIKE YOU MEAN IT!  Right?

1. Get out there and join them in their fun!

Play in the yard.  Climb that treehouse (build it first, if necessary).  Ride that bike.  Throw that ball.  Try the disc golf park.  Practice that sport.  Play chase.  Sit and talk out in that special spot.  Play that weird, evolving game your kid is trying to teach you that seems to make no sense whatsoever.  Etc.  Joining our kids in their choice of fun outdoor activities helps to keep parents young at heart, and shows our kids that we are eager to be a part of their world and don’t insist on them always joining our world to spend time with us.

2. Invite your kids to assist you in your work or special projects.

Not all kids will jump at this chance, I know.  But many children (especially if you start when they are young!) are thrilled with the opportunity to be Mom’s or Dad’s right hand helper on a manual project.  It gives them such a sense of value and self-respect, as well as helping them learn valuable life skills, when we include them in that cleaning, building, planting, arranging, etc. project.

3. Serve someone together.

Find someone in your neighborhood, church, or school community who could really use some help with a special project or maintenance challenge that is beyond their capability.  Bring your kids and serve them as a family.  Your kids will learn the powerful spiritual and community value of blessing others (maybe you’ll learn it with them!).  Your relationship will be cemented in a fresh way by sharing the common bond of sweat equity together.

And don’t forget to have fun cooling off together when sweat time is over!

Tags: family, fitness, nature, parenting, spiritual formation

Heard this song today for the first time on KLOVE radio.  Had to share this amazing version of the Good News from Peter Furler with you!  Thank you, God, for reaching for me every day.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.

Tags: HOPE, the journey

I watched Chariots of Fire tonight as I “ran” on my elliptical machine (I highly recommend this combination, by the way).  I was eager for the running.  I had forgotten how deeply stirring was the faith of Eric Liddell.  Here are the words he shared in a speech after a race in his beloved Scotland…

You came to see a race today…see someone win.  It happened to be me.  But I want you to do more than just watch a race.  I want you to take part in it.  I want to compare faith to running in a race.  It’s hard.  It requires concentration of will, energy of soul.  You experience elation when the winner breaks the tape – especially if you’ve got a bet on it.    But how long does that last?  You go home.  Maybe your dinner’s burned.  Maybe…maybe you haven’t got a job.  So who am I to say, Believe – Have faith, in the face of life’s realities?  I would like to give you something more permanent.  But I can only point the way.  I have no formula for winning the race.  Everyone runs in her own way, or his own way.  And where does the power come from, to see the race to its end?  From within.  Jesus said, “Behold, the Kingdom of God is within you.  If with all your heart, you truly seek me, you shall ever surely find me.”  If you commit yourself to the love of Christ, then THAT is how you run a straight race.

Well said, Brother.  Well said.  More original posts coming soon, but this speech really caught me tonight, so I wanted to share it with you.  I guess it caught me when he said running the race of faith/life is hard.  Yes, it is.  Overcoming the desires of my flesh to take the easier, softer way of sinful self-indulgence is just plain old tough for me.  Maybe it is for you, too.  I want so much to surrender my will so fully to God each day that He totally has His Way with my life.  I truly believe this is the absolute best possible way for me to live, every single day.

At least, my spirit of faith believes this.  My flesh tells me otherwise, goaded on by the venomous lies of the Serpent.  And I stumble in the race.  Or fall behind.  Or take too many water breaks.  Or just want to give it up.  But my spirit within me won’t give up, fueled by the sweet Voice of Truth, The Holy Spirit of God.  God’s Word invites me to run in such a way as to win the prize.  And the prize is SO worth the struggle!  And the sweetest part is, Jesus has already secured it for me.  He paid for it, and has already reserved my place in the winners’ circle.  I just have to keep running the race until I get there to join Him along with the great company of saints who have run before me, are running with me, and will run the race behind me.  So, I’m going to keep on running the race.

There’s room for another in the winners’ circle.  Care to join me?

Tags: fitness, HOPE, movies, spiritual formation, the journey

Time to get back into blog rhythm…

I’m not even sure where I’m going to go with this post, but I have to write about the experience. My family and I are currently making plans for another Disney World trip. Right now, the primary decisions to made involve rooms – which resort and what type of rooms. As my wife and I were discussing the possibilities, and taking input from our seven year old son, he offered an unexpected twist. We wanted to know if he was more interested in the amenities available at one site over another. He was thinking along another line…

“I know!  I can share a room with Dad, and you can stay with Nana and Memaw, Mom!”

“But I want to stay with my husband, you know.”

“Yes, son, I really look forward to staying with my wife on our vacation time.”

“But this way, you girls can chat about girl stuff, and me and Dad can chat about guy stuff.”

“Oh really!  What kind of stuff were you thinking of?”

“You know!  Mom, you and Nana and Memaw can chat about beautiful stuff.  Dad, you and me can chat about destructive stuff.”

The kid is only seven years old and already has the solid gender constructs that femininity is about beauty and relational celebration, and masculinity is about destruction and explosive power! And it’s funny how this has impacted me as I consider it.  I am very pleased to know he has a clear distinction in his mind about masculinity and femininity, and that he obviously identifies with me (a virtual paragon of masculinity).  And on a very immature, flesh level, it feels good to hear him pick me as his favorite parent.  Look – just keepin it real, okay!

But I want him to understand that true masculinity, at its very best, is FAR more than having the power to destroy.  I am reminded of the scene from “The Lion King” where King Mufasa is talking to his young son, Simba, about what it means to be king.  At one point, Simba cries out, “But don’t kings get their way all the time?!”  To which his father replies, “Simba!  There’s more to being king than getting your way all the time!”  “There’s MORE!” exclaims the eager, yet self-centered lad.  Then Mufasa begins to explain to him the “Great Circle of Life.”

I think my son has just opened up a golden opportunity for me to expound upon his understanding of manhood, and help him catch a vision for a much grander identity and purpose.  I need to tell him and show him how a Real Man uses his strength to bless, lead, encourage, fight, equip, defend, build, and ultimately surrender to God’s greater purposes.  As my buddy, Hans, would say – “Time to man up!”

Tags: character, leadership, manhood, parenting, spiritual formation, teaching, the journey