Do you ever find yourself wondering how you are doing with with your teen(s)? Maybe you are unsure how to even assess things. Well, if you see any of these indicators in your relationship, it’s a good clue you must be doing something right:
1. Your teen likes bringing friends home to hang out. This is huge! It means you have created an atmosphere that not only feels safe for your teen, but is even comfortable enough to share with other teens. And as a bonus, it is also a clear affirmation that your teen isn’t totally humiliated by you. WAY TO GO!!!
2. Your teen regularly invites you to watch/listen/play digital entertainment selections together. Another big deal. This lets you know your adolescent isn’t feeling totally judged, criticized, or rejected by you. No way you would be included in her/his digital entertainment space if you were viewed as a “hater.” There is clearly something genuinely secure in your relationship with one another, and you may even be viewed as something along the lines of…cool.
3. Your teen periodically gets mad at you for saying “No” and committing other similar horrible acts of parenting. Congratulations. You are exercising healthy authority, discipline, and boundaries for the sake of your child’s growth. If you can check this box, along with at least one of the others, you are a blue ribbon parent.
4. Your teen uses the words “Thank you” and “I love you” in your general direction without an obvious roll of the eyes at least once a week. Step up to the high platform and enjoy your national anthem – this is champion level parenting! Your teen didn’t get to this place by accident. You have been consistently sharing your own healthy love and affection with him/her for some time now. And you have likely guided your child toward healthy maturity, if these words are still being spoken from your teen’s mouth.
This simple list is not intended to be comprehensive, of course. And it isn’t shared to scold you, if you aren’t seeing these things reflected in your home. Rather, I hope it will serve to encourage you today. Take heart in seeing the things you are doing well in raising your kids. What are some of the other signs you see in your own relationship that reveal good things happening?